Happy 3rd Birthday, Baby Girl!

Rylan Rae.....my birthday girl. Mommy loves you so very much. You are such a joy to our family and to every single person you encounter. Your dance teacher the other day smiled so big when you walked through the door and said, "There's my little ray of sunshine!" Dance and gymnastics have become your favorite places in the world (and some of Mommy's, too). It's so fun to see you jumping and prancing around with your little friends (and actually following directions)....it's easy sometimes to flash forward and envision you years older giggling with your girlfriends at a sleepover. I wish sometimes I could wrap you up and keep you THIS age forever and ever. I think I've said that at every stage in your life so far....but this age is definitely my favorite. You're so full of life and love....and you are SUCH a little chatterbox. We were standing in line at the craft store today for close to 10 minutes, and you literally did not shut up the entire time. You had everyone within earshot laughing....until you decided to pass gas. LOUDLY. And, unfortunately, not just loud.....but long. I can honestly say I've never heard anything even close to that come from something so little, and most of the time so cute. It was totally reminiscent of this scene from Step Brothers....down to the little finale. You know, the one where that last high pitched toot comes just when you think it's all over.



You're lucky I love you so much.....I've never turned that shade of red before. EVER.

But, that's you....Rylan Rae. Full of piss and vinegar and every other thing imaginable. You can turn on the charm in 2 seconds flat....only to be in full fledged, alligator sized tears moments later. But, I wouldn't change any of it for the world. I absolutely LOVE your determined, honest, sassy, outgoing personality. Maybe not your moments of SHEER honesty like the one today :) but the other ones.....the ones where you cup my face in your little hands and tell me, "You're the best Mommy EVER."

I LOVE YOU MY LITTLE DINOSAUR PRINCESS!

The Big News....

In case you missed yesterday's Facebook news...Rylan (and Kohen) have a big announcement!



March 30th is the big due date, so I'm just getting past that 1st yucky trimester. Other than EXTREME exhaustion, everything has been going great! It's so nice to have the kids finally in on the big secret...I hated keeping it from them. Kohen was so excited, he told his little buddy 1st thing the next morning on the way to the bus stop and his teacher sent me an email minutes after school started saying congrats :) I'm just so happy that they are so happy. Now if I can just stay out of those cupcakes we made yesterday.....

9 Years Ago Today.....

....I woke up in Iowa City bright and early (with only a slight headache from the night before) all revved up to tailgate for the Iowa/Iowa State game. My phone rang just a few minutes past 7am and I remember looking down, seeing my parents phone number and thinking to myself as I raised the phone to my ear, "Should I say 'Hi, Mom' or 'Hi, Dad' when I answer".

I went with the later.

My brother's sad, almost unrecognizable, voice answered in return. When he first choked out the words, my initial reaction was to yell at him. Stop saying that. Stop saying those words. Let me talk to Dad.

9 years ago today, my dad passed away from a massive heart attack in his sleep. He fell asleep and never woke up. He literally fell asleep on his side, and never moved again from that position. That thought has always given me comfort. There was no pain, only peace.

But that peace left our family with a big hole. A big giant hole that only a dad/grandpa/husband can fill. I miss you, Dad. I miss hearing you say, "I never did like you" (our funny little way of saying I love you). I miss hearing you ask me when the last time was I had my oil changed. You know what I did the morning of my wedding? Bright and early, when other soon-to-be-brides would normally be off pampering themselves, I went and filled my car up with gas, had it washed, and had my oil changed. It was the only way I could have a little 'father/daughter' time on my big day.

It makes me angry still to think of big moments that we missed out on. You should have been there on my wedding day to dance that awkward dance with me. You should have been there to see my 1st home. You should have been there for the births of my babies. Birthdays. Holidays. All of it. I'm just missing you, Dad. Today and always.

Mom was just saying the other day, this girl would have you wrapped around her little finger. Pretty sure I would have to agree :) Her attitude some days may only slightly resemble someone you once knew....

Today was her 1st day of preschool....and this is what the majority of the pictures turned out like.

Those curls and that face would have worked all kinds of magic over you.

I think tonight when I'm tucking the kids into bed, I'm going to tell them "You know, I really never did like you"....just to see what they say. I'm sure I'll eventually tell them it's actually a term of endearment, and that I really do love them to pieces....but I think it'll make you smile to hear their reactions :)

Love you, Dad.

My Little Magician....

Rylan has apparently discovered magic. She just came running full speed into the kitchen yelling, "MOMMY! MOMMY! You want to see my magic trick?"

"Of course, Rylan. Show me your magic trick."

(Throwing up two little fists, which were both blatantly empty) "Pick a hand, Mommy. Which one has the magic wand in it?!"

(Pointing to the left hand) "That one. That one definitely has the magic wand in it."

(A fit of giggles) "NOPE! Come on, Mommy! Which one has the magic wand in it??!"

(Pointing to the right hand) "Ok, let's try again. That one! That one, MOST definitely, has the magic wand in it."

(Falling down on the floor laughing uncontrollably, throwing both her little empty hands up to show me) "MOMMY!! The magic wand is GONE! I told you it was magic!!"

Still reeling from laughter, she looked up at me and said "Hey! You want to see me make my sisser (sister) disappear?!"

Seeing as though she doesn't have a sisser....apparently she's a pretty decent magician :)